Toddlers terrible tantrims behaviour where to start

Toddlers and bad behaviour/tantrums. Ok when will they stop. Through my own experience of growing up 4 children of my own and dealing with the 0 - 6 year age group for more than 9 and 1/2 years. The real truth is when we stop giving into them. I'm sorry but it is true. We all get the guilts of working long hours and coming home and feeling like we don't spend enough time with our children so we give in and buy them things that are unnecessary or let them do things that we would usualy say no to.

Children especially Toddlers are not silly and learn at a very early age how to push our buttons to get what they want. The problem is if you give in to them just once and then the next time you say no and this is when they try another way of convincing you to say yes, Which  usually involves screaming, kicking and some might throw things or even bite.

This is when you should show them that you will not tolerate this behaviour by having an area or a corner which is boring to look at and has nothing to amuse them and give them time out but you need to get down to their level and not stand over them because it only intimidates them more. Always try to look them in the eye even when they don't want to look back at you and use voice of authority, stay calm and do not yell because your teaching them that yelling is alright and they will learn to yell back.

This will have tobe persitant and do not give in. Do not argue with them when you put them in the corner always walk away and leave them to think about what they have done. Tell them to sit there for 3 minutes and come back and ask them if they are sorry and to say sorry and give them a hug. It will take a little time to work but don't give in as it will start to improve their behaviour and you will use your time out corner less and less.

Praise them for good behaviour by designing a chart which shows them for everyday they are good they go up a level until they reach the top. Get them to help make the chart as this helps them understand what and why they are doing it. The reward could be a treat or an outing or something that you can decide on together about. You must also show them when they are naughty usually after a time out session to go over to the chart and take them down a level and explain this is for not doing the right thing and you have to try to get back up to the top by being good or we will take longer to do our special treat or outing which you will remind them about.

Bad behaviour in public.(tantrums) Depending on what where you are going. The best thing to do is include them in part of what you are doing eg: Shopping, posting mail etc.. Get them to help put things in the shopping cart or put the stamps on envelopes and put them in the post box as you will be surprised how well behaved they can be when you include them in what you are doing. Always tell them what you are about to do eg: getting ready at home they could be playing and you might tell them they will have to tidy up soon as we are going shopping, this will give them time to adjust and warning so you don't have to rush them off as this can create bad behaviour as they can feel rushed and react to it all.

When they have done a good job make sure you tell them how pleased you were with them helping you today and that they did a wonderful job and were lots of help to you. Explain that you will go home and put them up another level for being so good.

Family activity or time together.

I know in this day an age some our of lives and jobs are rather hectic but it is important that as a family that you try to do something together. This could be going for a walk, or kicking ball at the park or bike riding, playing in the back yard or culing up to read a story book. Kids love this and you will be surprised how much you will to. It's just finding, well actually making time to do so and enjoying your kids and your kids enjoying you. Try and stick to a daily routine if possible, can be flexible but some form of routine as children need this and so do we as this does make life easier for us all. Just wait and see how much you and your children will grow from good behaviour stratagies.

Gone are the days of cane sticks and belts as this type strategy doesn't make the actual real problem go away. It is all about comunication, bonding and routine, timeout is the best way as it will become an event that will happen less and less by sticking to it and not giving into them no matter what. You will be better off in time to come and you willl wonder why you didn't do this sooner.

We as a family can enjoy life as a whole.